クリス・クレメンズによるSchön! Magazineのインタビュー

For a decade, Chris Klemens has been making people laugh on YouTube. Posting videos where he gives himself acrylic toenails, customizes Labubus, and blacks out making Ariana Madix’s cocktails at home in his gorgeous kitchen. In terms of content, Klemens doesn’t make the same type of video over and over again; if anything, he does the opposite. Each upload brings something fresh to the table. The guarantee is always the same, though: Chris Klemens is going to make you laugh. Chances are, he already has – his content tends to go viral.

Lately, Klemens has taken his comedic sensibilities and ventured into the world of stand-up. Stepping out from behind the camera and onto the stage in a move that made fans say, “Wait, he hasn’t always been doing this?” And while the transition hasn’t been without hiccups, even his off-nights turn into something memorable: after one tough set, he spent an hour passing the mic through the crowd, riffing and connecting with total ease. What could have been an off night became something really special.

That energy inspired his latest venture, his podcast, “Chris vs. The People”. Listeners call in, share their dirty laundry, and Klemens offers his brutally honest take. It’s fun, fast-paced, and a little bit all over the place – basically everything he does best.

In conversation with Schön! Chris Klemens sits down to discuss how he’s created a career that combines all his passions and interests, what it’s like chatting with folks who call into his podcast, and more.

I’ve loved watching your career trajectory. Is this what you always envisioned for yourself?

No, YouTube was a total accident. Social media just kind of happened. I’d been watching YouTube since around 2007, back when you could customize your channel backgrounds. I’ve always loved social media and making friends online, even though my computer teacher constantly warned us not to. It all felt really normal and natural to me. I remember having a Twitter account in high school, and people were shocked—like, “You tweet every thought?” And I was like, “Well, some of us might get dementia, and I don’t want to forget what sandwich I was eating in high school.”

Eventually, I thought, “Yeah, I can make YouTube videos,” but I didn’t want to get bullied. Once I got to college, I started posting. It began as a hobby. At the time, I wanted to be an actor or a photographer, but as I kept making videos and evolving my content, I realized I was funny and had a comedic voice. I never thought I’d be a comedian, especially since it was something I used to get in trouble for—making jokes all the time. But here we are, just riding the wave as it comes.

One thing I really admire about you, as a longtime follower, is how many passions you have—fashion, design, comedy—and how you tie them all into one cohesive career. You do fashion roasts, have your clothing line ‘Middle Kid’, vlog about decorating your homes… and it all fits perfectly into your brand. How do you pull all your interests together into this one “galaxy” of a career?

I think a lot of people box themselves in when building an online presence, but it’s not that simple. We’re human beings, and humans have depth and a wide range of interests. It would be weird to limit myself just because something doesn’t “fit” my brand. My brand is me—I’m the product. Whatever I’m into might not always make sense to others, and that’s fine. I find fashion challenging, and some people think it’s out of touch, but for me, it’s something I’ve worked hard to be part of.

If you’re living authentically, it all fits together and feeds into each other. When I was decorating my home, I still approached it as a comedian—but one with good taste. It’s like furniture shopping with a funny friend. You can be funny anywhere. So I see it as combining design and comedy. I’m just a comedian who loves fashion and design. I’ve never thought, “I need to strategically merge these worlds.” They’re just my interests, and that’s enough. There’s no need to put yourself in a box when there’s so much to explore—especially when the world’s falling apart anyway.

You’ve been doing stand-up for a few years now. What was it like getting into that? It must have been daunting at first.

It was daunting—and I was doing it completely raw. I had no idea what beta blockers were. Looking back, I can’t believe I got on stage for years without them. It’s been a journey. I started stand-up about eight to ten years into my career, after mastering the online and social media side of things. When you’ve done something that long, you feel confident—you know what you’re doing. Starting something new triggered massive imposter syndrome.

I’ve asked myself, “Do I actually want to do this, or do I just want to grow beyond making videos?” For now, I’m treating it as something fun. Even if I don’t do it long-term, I’ll always look back fondly and think, “I can’t believe I did that.” It’s a completely different beast. Most people probably think, “Yeah, no kidding, Chris,” but it’s exciting to learn something from the ground up again.

What’s been the most surprising thing about stand-up so far?

Honestly, the most surprising thing is how many people tell me it’s their first-ever comedy show. After the show, at meet and greets or outside the venue, they’ll say, “This was my first comedy show ever.” It’s amazing to introduce people to stand-up and have them take that leap of faith with me. I love hearing that. I joke that I’m glad it was their first—no expectations, I am the bar.

I love that. What’s different for you between preparing content for YouTube or your podcast versus doing a live stand-up?

They’re all very different. If anything, the podcast and stand-up are more similar. My podcast, ‘Chris vs. The People’, actually came from doing a stand-up show. I was filming my special ‘A Quickie in New York’, which is on my YouTube channel…

Oh yeah, baby, I’ve watched it.

Thank you. I bombed during it. I forgot my entire set, but because I have a video editing background, I knew exactly where I left off. I actually left the stage to look at my set and get myself back on track. It was pre–beta blockers, if that’s not surprising. I used my editing mindset to remember exactly where I was standing, where I was looking, and picked back up from there. It sucks that I had to rely on editing instincts in that moment, but I was very aware that people were spending their hard-earned money to be there. I hate leaving an event feeling like, “Wow, that was a waste of time and money.” I wanted people to leave feeling full.

So after my stand-up set, I did about an hour and a half of just passing the mic around the audience—asking if anyone had advice, questions, or funny stories. We were just talking and laughing, and it was so much fun. That’s when it clicked. I’d been interviewing people on the street for a decade—why not do that for my podcast? My old podcast had lost direction. I didn’t feel like one of those people who can just turn on a mic and ramble. Some are great at that, but I’m not. That live show is actually what inspired ‘Chris vs. The People.’

Wow, that’s so cool. I didn’t realize that. How have you managed to capture that same vibe in all those phone calls? I imagine some people are great, and some are harder to work with.

That’s been really hard. Because I’m doing this so far into my career, there’s already an established parasocial relationship and a lot of admiration from people. But from my perspective, I’m trying to make a show people want to listen to. Sometimes I’m on the phone thinking, “Oh my God, how is my editor going to cut this?” because someone’s been talking for twenty-five minutes, telling the most ADHD story—and I say that with love, because that’s me too. It’s just hard to anticipate how the calls will go.

I have people fill out a Google form and answer a few questions. On my last show, I just had people call in directly, and that was rough—some were so nervous since it was their first time talking to me, and you could hear it. Now I pre-screen people with short calls, so I have a sense of how they tell a story. I don’t ask many questions in advance. If someone’s story is like, “I slept with my best friend’s mom for eight months,” I’ll tell them, “Okay, gather all the details, and when I call you back, we’ll record and jump right in.” That’s how the pre-calls usually go, so I get a decent sense of what we’re working with.

Do you ever say no to people after a pre-call?

Once I call them, no—I can’t do that to people. I don’t want anyone thinking, “Chris thought my story was stupid.” That’s a complex no one needs. If younger me had gotten a call from Hilary Duff and she said, “Yeah, actually, I don’t love this story,” I would’ve lost my mind. So I usually make my editor be the bad guy. He’ll say, “Chris, there was so much potential, but this is hard to make listenable.” Sometimes people have to get cut, but it’s never personal—it’s about the final product. People are listening in their cars on the way to work; it needs to flow, and sometimes it just doesn’t. But I truly appreciate everyone willing to put their heart out there and share wild stories—stuff you couldn’t waterboard out of me.

Oh my God, yeah, that’s insane. Has anything directly inspired material for your stand-up?

Yeah, it has, but I’ve never really thought about putting it into stand-up. I record the podcast in my basement in Delaware—no windows—and usually at night, because people work during the day. By the time I’m done, it’s all a blur.

People ask, “What’s the craziest call you’ve had?” and I’m like, “No idea.” The only episode I remember is the last one because I wrote the description. It’s two hours of hearing insane stories, and I’m just sitting there like, “Why do I have a following? You’re all way more interesting.” My stand-up tends to be more autobiographical. I’ve lived a functionally dysfunctional life—my mom hates when I say “dysfunctional.” She’s like, “Chris, stop.”

You’re dissing her a little by accident.

That’s honestly the hardest part about stand-up—making jokes about my life without making the people in my life feel like the butt of the joke. I’ll exaggerate things for a bit, of course, but my family will be like, “That’s not true!” And I’m like, “Who cares? It’s funny.” It’s definitely tricky—balancing honesty with privacy. That’s the hardest part of stand-up for me.

Yeah, I think one thing you do really well is you’re so good at roasting people without being mean-spirited.

I just got chills. [Holds up a goosebumped arm] That’s the nicest thing ever. I just did a ‘VMAs Roast’, and honestly, I have breakdowns before every roast. It’s all supposed to be fun—we’re just talking about clothes. Some people are wearing them, some people aren’t. It’s not that deep. And yeah, sometimes I rag on people. Like, during the ‘VMAs Roast’, Alix Earle showed up in what looked like a pillowcase with armholes—dressed like her personality: white and boring. [laughs]

I know it sounds harsh, but I just want it to be funny and lighthearted. I get really stressed because I’m a people pleaser and don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. I never want someone to see a roast and think, “I hate that guy.”

Has anyone been offended?

Yeah, some have—and that’s scary, because I’m like, “No, I love you!”

Sometimes they’re your friends too. I’ve seen you not love Finneas’ outfits.

Yeah. I’ve had friends tell me they were uncomfortable—not Finneas, but others. And honestly, no piece of content is worth hurting someone’s feelings. The roasts are meant to be lighthearted, but I understand not everyone’s into that. When friends are involved, it complicates things. I try to walk that fine line, but it’s definitely one of the more stressful parts of what I do.

I think at the end of the day, your comedy is self-deprecating—you’re the butt of the joke most of the time. Even when you make a snarkier or meaner joke, it comes from a place where you’ve already said ten times worse about yourself.

I hate nobody more than myself. I really try to be an equal-opportunity offender. Nothing is that serious. I mean, sure, there are serious things, but that’s not what I’m talking about.

What would be your elevator pitch for someone who’s never heard of you or your podcast?

That’s hard, because I care so much about my career that I overthink how to describe it—kind of like when someone asks your favorite food. I’ll say spaghetti, then fries, then steak, and suddenly I sound insane. My elevator pitch would probably be that I’m just a normal person who fell into all of this. I somehow have the ability to make people feel comfortable when I talk to them, and at the end of the day, we’re all just people living unique experiences. But within that uniqueness, there’s so much relatability.

I’ve talked to so many people on ‘Chris vs. The People’, and they’ll say the most insane things, but I still understand what it feels like to be in their shoes in a different way. It’s a great lesson in perspective—like, “Oh my God, I thought I’d done embarrassing stuff. Look at this person telling the story on the phone—maybe it’s not that bad.” I don’t know if that’s an elevator pitch—it’s more like the elevator broke down and I’m rambling—but really, I just love connecting with people about the mundane things we all feel embarrassed by, laugh about, and realize aren’t that serious.

How has your stand-up evolved from when you first started to now?

It’s evolved immensely. When I started, I was doing what I thought stand-up was—trying to write a full set and mold myself to fit the format. Now I’ve learned to make the format fit me.

I’ve started leaning into crowd work, letting every show be different because the audience makes the show. It’s stressful, but I love it. I once did a show in New York where someone wrote on a piece of paper, “Harvey Weinstein shouldn’t be in jail.” I picked it thinking the crowd would laugh and say, “Because he should be dead,” or something uniting—but the person in the front row said, “I just don’t think he should be in jail.”

So now I’m staring into the face of someone who paid to be there—a fan of mine who’s also a fan of Harvey Weinstein. That definitely created a tricky environment. [Laughs] But honestly, I thrive in those unpredictable moments. I’ve been thinking on my feet since third grade—arguing with teachers, coming up with things on the spot. So my stand-up has really evolved into heavy crowd work, and I love it. Every show is new and exciting because I never know what’s going to happen.

Is there ever a topic you’ve wanted to work into a set but can’t figure out how?

A lot of personal stories, honestly. That’s the hardest part. I’ve had so many weird, funny, dysfunctional experiences in my life, but writing and performing them feels tough. I don’t want to blow up anyone’s spot in my real life. My goal is to write a book—a comedic autobiography, in a way. I’m hoping that’ll help me write everything out and then structure it into a tour, bringing more autobiographical material into my set. It’s been on my mind for a while.

That said, I was the student writing a ten-page paper the morning it was due at Starbucks, so I don’t know why I keep setting myself up like this. Like, “Let’s write a book.” Okay, Chris—maybe finish a paper first.

Well, my last question for you then is—how excited are we about Hilary Duff and the new music?

Oh, finally, the important questions! [Laughs] Yes! I don’t think my phone has ever blown up like it did when she announced that—on my birthday, the same day I won a Webby Award, no less. There’s never been more activity on my phone than when Hilary Erhard Duff announced her return to music with a docuseries and live shows. 

I have my theories about what it’ll be like, based on what she’s been posting.

I’m wondering if Matthew Koma’s going to be producing or songwriting. Personally, I don’t know anything, but based on her hints—she said “new music coming” and added “why not?” to her website signup—I wonder if she’s pulling a Taylor Swift and re-recording her old music. That’s my theory! Maybe she’ll get Miley Cyrus on a song or feature other artists on reimagined versions of old tracks. That might just be my wishful thinking, but I’m so excited.

I really hope she’s playing guitar—remember when she took lessons a few years ago?

Of course—the baby blue glitter guitar! How could I forget? I’m thrilled. People are calling it a recession indicator, and I’m like, fine—let it be. I’ll be front row. It’s so funny that we’re all adults now with money, and we’re like, “I’ll spend whatever it takes.” The price? My arm? Take it.

Literally—I don’t need kids. Take my ovaries!

[Laughs] Exactly! She’s a woman who deserves the world. I don’t know her, but I’m obsessed. She made my childhood magical, and I’ll always be grateful. I went to her concerts with my mom, who was such a trooper—meet and greets, book signings, everything—with a smile the whole time.  When she announced the comeback, I called my mom immediately and said, “We’re going to be front row at a Hilary Duff concert.” Without hesitation, my mom said, “Oh my God, I’m there.”

I love that.

What dreams are made of. [Both laugh]

Chris Klemen’s podcast ‘Chris vs. The People’ is out now.

photography. Zach Alston
fashion. Laura Spriet
talent. Chris Klemens
grooming. Angel Gabriel @ See Management
production. Kelsey Barnes
interview. Kendall Saretksy

For a decade, Chris Klemens has been making people laugh on YouTube. Posting videos where he gives himself acrylic toenails, customizes Labubus, and blacks out making Ariana Madix’s cocktails at home in his gorgeous kitchen. In terms of content, Klemens doesn’t make the same type of video over and over again; if anything, he does the opposite. Each upload brings something fresh to the table. The guarantee is always the same, though: Chris Klemens is going to make you laugh. Chances are, he already has – his content tends to go viral.

Lately, Klemens has taken his comedic sensibilities and ventured into the world of stand-up. Stepping out from behind the camera and onto the stage in a move that made fans say, “Wait, he hasn’t always been doing this?” And while the transition hasn’t been without hiccups, even his off-nights turn into something memorable: after one tough set, he spent an hour passing the mic through the crowd, riffing and connecting with total ease. What could have been an off night became something really special.

That energy inspired his latest venture, his podcast, “Chris vs. The People”. Listeners call in, share their dirty laundry, and Klemens offers his brutally honest take. It’s fun, fast-paced, and a little bit all over the place – basically everything he does best.

In conversation with Schön! Chris Klemens sits down to discuss how he’s created a career that combines all his passions and interests, what it’s like chatting with folks who call into his podcast, and more.

I’ve loved watching your career trajectory. Is this what you always envisioned for yourself?

No, YouTube was a total accident. Social media just kind of happened. I’d been watching YouTube since around 2007, back when you could customize your channel backgrounds. I’ve always loved social media and making friends online, even though my computer teacher constantly warned us not to. It all felt really normal and natural to me. I remember having a Twitter account in high school, and people were shocked—like, “You tweet every thought?” And I was like, “Well, some of us might get dementia, and I don’t want to forget what sandwich I was eating in high school.”

Eventually, I thought, “Yeah, I can make YouTube videos,” but I didn’t want to get bullied. Once I got to college, I started posting. It began as a hobby. At the time, I wanted to be an actor or a photographer, but as I kept making videos and evolving my content, I realized I was funny and had a comedic voice. I never thought I’d be a comedian, especially since it was something I used to get in trouble for—making jokes all the time. But here we are, just riding the wave as it comes.

One thing I really admire about you, as a longtime follower, is how many passions you have—fashion, design, comedy—and how you tie them all into one cohesive career. You do fashion roasts, have your clothing line ‘Middle Kid’, vlog about decorating your homes… and it all fits perfectly into your brand. How do you pull all your interests together into this one “galaxy” of a career?

I think a lot of people box themselves in when building an online presence, but it’s not that simple. We’re human beings, and humans have depth and a wide range of interests. It would be weird to limit myself just because something doesn’t “fit” my brand. My brand is me—I’m the product. Whatever I’m into might not always make sense to others, and that’s fine. I find fashion challenging, and some people think it’s out of touch, but for me, it’s something I’ve worked hard to be part of.

If you’re living authentically, it all fits together and feeds into each other. When I was decorating my home, I still approached it as a comedian—but one with good taste. It’s like furniture shopping with a funny friend. You can be funny anywhere. So I see it as combining design and comedy. I’m just a comedian who loves fashion and design. I’ve never thought, “I need to strategically merge these worlds.” They’re just my interests, and that’s enough. There’s no need to put yourself in a box when there’s so much to explore—especially when the world’s falling apart anyway.

You’ve been doing stand-up for a few years now. What was it like getting into that? It must have been daunting at first.

It was daunting—and I was doing it completely raw. I had no idea what beta blockers were. Looking back, I can’t believe I got on stage for years without them. It’s been a journey. I started stand-up about eight to ten years into my career, after mastering the online and social media side of things. When you’ve done something that long, you feel confident—you know what you’re doing. Starting something new triggered massive imposter syndrome.

I’ve asked myself, “Do I actually want to do this, or do I just want to grow beyond making videos?” For now, I’m treating it as something fun. Even if I don’t do it long-term, I’ll always look back fondly and think, “I can’t believe I did that.” It’s a completely different beast. Most people probably think, “Yeah, no kidding, Chris,” but it’s exciting to learn something from the ground up again.

What’s been the most surprising thing about stand-up so far?

Honestly, the most surprising thing is how many people tell me it’s their first-ever comedy show. After the show, at meet and greets or outside the venue, they’ll say, “This was my first comedy show ever.” It’s amazing to introduce people to stand-up and have them take that leap of faith with me. I love hearing that. I joke that I’m glad it was their first—no expectations, I am the bar.

I love that. What’s different for you between preparing content for YouTube or your podcast versus doing a live stand-up?

They’re all very different. If anything, the podcast and stand-up are more similar. My podcast, ‘Chris vs. The People’, actually came from doing a stand-up show. I was filming my special ‘A Quickie in New York’, which is on my YouTube channel…

Oh yeah, baby, I’ve watched it.

Thank you. I bombed during it. I forgot my entire set, but because I have a video editing background, I knew exactly where I left off. I actually left the stage to look at my set and get myself back on track. It was pre–beta blockers, if that’s not surprising. I used my editing mindset to remember exactly where I was standing, where I was looking, and picked back up from there. It sucks that I had to rely on editing instincts in that moment, but I was very aware that people were spending their hard-earned money to be there. I hate leaving an event feeling like, “Wow, that was a waste of time and money.” I wanted people to leave feeling full.

So after my stand-up set, I did about an hour and a half of just passing the mic around the audience—asking if anyone had advice, questions, or funny stories. We were just talking and laughing, and it was so much fun. That’s when it clicked. I’d been interviewing people on the street for a decade—why not do that for my podcast? My old podcast had lost direction. I didn’t feel like one of those people who can just turn on a mic and ramble. Some are great at that, but I’m not. That live show is actually what inspired ‘Chris vs. The People.’

Wow, that’s so cool. I didn’t realize that. How have you managed to capture that same vibe in all those phone calls? I imagine some people are great, and some are harder to work with.

That’s been really hard. Because I’m doing this so far into my career, there’s already an established parasocial relationship and a lot of admiration from people. But from my perspective, I’m trying to make a show people want to listen to. Sometimes I’m on the phone thinking, “Oh my God, how is my editor going to cut this?” because someone’s been talking for twenty-five minutes, telling the most ADHD story—and I say that with love, because that’s me too. It’s just hard to anticipate how the calls will go.

I have people fill out a Google form and answer a few questions. On my last show, I just had people call in directly, and that was rough—some were so nervous since it was their first time talking to me, and you could hear it. Now I pre-screen people with short calls, so I have a sense of how they tell a story. I don’t ask many questions in advance. If someone’s story is like, “I slept with my best friend’s mom for eight months,” I’ll tell them, “Okay, gather all the details, and when I call you back, we’ll record and jump right in.” That’s how the pre-calls usually go, so I get a decent sense of what we’re working with.

Do you ever say no to people after a pre-call?

Once I call them, no—I can’t do that to people. I don’t want anyone thinking, “Chris thought my story was stupid.” That’s a complex no one needs. If younger me had gotten a call from Hilary Duff and she said, “Yeah, actually, I don’t love this story,” I would’ve lost my mind. So I usually make my editor be the bad guy. He’ll say, “Chris, there was so much potential, but this is hard to make listenable.” Sometimes people have to get cut, but it’s never personal—it’s about the final product. People are listening in their cars on the way to work; it needs to flow, and sometimes it just doesn’t. But I truly appreciate everyone willing to put their heart out there and share wild stories—stuff you couldn’t waterboard out of me.

Oh my God, yeah, that’s insane. Has anything directly inspired material for your stand-up?

Yeah, it has, but I’ve never really thought about putting it into stand-up. I record the podcast in my basement in Delaware—no windows—and usually at night, because people work during the day. By the time I’m done, it’s all a blur.

People ask, “What’s the craziest call you’ve had?” and I’m like, “No idea.” The only episode I remember is the last one because I wrote the description. It’s two hours of hearing insane stories, and I’m just sitting there like, “Why do I have a following? You’re all way more interesting.” My stand-up tends to be more autobiographical. I’ve lived a functionally dysfunctional life—my mom hates when I say “dysfunctional.” She’s like, “Chris, stop.”

You’re dissing her a little by accident.

That’s honestly the hardest part about stand-up—making jokes about my life without making the people in my life feel like the butt of the joke. I’ll exaggerate things for a bit, of course, but my family will be like, “That’s not true!” And I’m like, “Who cares? It’s funny.” It’s definitely tricky—balancing honesty with privacy. That’s the hardest part of stand-up for me.

Yeah, I think one thing you do really well is you’re so good at roasting people without being mean-spirited.

I just got chills. [Holds up a goosebumped arm] That’s the nicest thing ever. I just did a ‘VMAs Roast’, and honestly, I have breakdowns before every roast. It’s all supposed to be fun—we’re just talking about clothes. Some people are wearing them, some people aren’t. It’s not that deep. And yeah, sometimes I rag on people. Like, during the ‘VMAs Roast’, Alix Earle showed up in what looked like a pillowcase with armholes—dressed like her personality: white and boring. [laughs]

I know it sounds harsh, but I just want it to be funny and lighthearted. I get really stressed because I’m a people pleaser and don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. I never want someone to see a roast and think, “I hate that guy.”

Has anyone been offended?

Yeah, some have—and that’s scary, because I’m like, “No, I love you!”

Sometimes they’re your friends too. I’ve seen you not love Finneas’ outfits.

Yeah. I’ve had friends tell me they were uncomfortable—not Finneas, but others. And honestly, no piece of content is worth hurting someone’s feelings. The roasts are meant to be lighthearted, but I understand not everyone’s into that. When friends are involved, it complicates things. I try to walk that fine line, but it’s definitely one of the more stressful parts of what I do.

I think at the end of the day, your comedy is self-deprecating—you’re the butt of the joke most of the time. Even when you make a snarkier or meaner joke, it comes from a place where you’ve already said ten times worse about yourself.

I hate nobody more than myself. I really try to be an equal-opportunity offender. Nothing is that serious. I mean, sure, there are serious things, but that’s not what I’m talking about.

What would be your elevator pitch for someone who’s never heard of you or your podcast?

That’s hard, because I care so much about my career that I overthink how to describe it—kind of like when someone asks your favorite food. I’ll say spaghetti, then fries, then steak, and suddenly I sound insane. My elevator pitch would probably be that I’m just a normal person who fell into all of this. I somehow have the ability to make people feel comfortable when I talk to them, and at the end of the day, we’re all just people living unique experiences. But within that uniqueness, there’s so much relatability.

I’ve talked to so many people on ‘Chris vs. The People’, and they’ll say the most insane things, but I still understand what it feels like to be in their shoes in a different way. It’s a great lesson in perspective—like, “Oh my God, I thought I’d done embarrassing stuff. Look at this person telling the story on the phone—maybe it’s not that bad.” I don’t know if that’s an elevator pitch—it’s more like the elevator broke down and I’m rambling—but really, I just love connecting with people about the mundane things we all feel embarrassed by, laugh about, and realize aren’t that serious.

How has your stand-up evolved from when you first started to now?

It’s evolved immensely. When I started, I was doing what I thought stand-up was—trying to write a full set and mold myself to fit the format. Now I’ve learned to make the format fit me.

I’ve started leaning into crowd work, letting every show be different because the audience makes the show. It’s stressful, but I love it. I once did a show in New York where someone wrote on a piece of paper, “Harvey Weinstein shouldn’t be in jail.” I picked it thinking the crowd would laugh and say, “Because he should be dead,” or something uniting—but the person in the front row said, “I just don’t think he should be in jail.”

So now I’m staring into the face of someone who paid to be there—a fan of mine who’s also a fan of Harvey Weinstein. That definitely created a tricky environment. [Laughs] But honestly, I thrive in those unpredictable moments. I’ve been thinking on my feet since third grade—arguing with teachers, coming up with things on the spot. So my stand-up has really evolved into heavy crowd work, and I love it. Every show is new and exciting because I never know what’s going to happen.

Is there ever a topic you’ve wanted to work into a set but can’t figure out how?

A lot of personal stories, honestly. That’s the hardest part. I’ve had so many weird, funny, dysfunctional experiences in my life, but writing and performing them feels tough. I don’t want to blow up anyone’s spot in my real life. My goal is to write a book—a comedic autobiography, in a way. I’m hoping that’ll help me write everything out and then structure it into a tour, bringing more autobiographical material into my set. It’s been on my mind for a while.

That said, I was the student writing a ten-page paper the morning it was due at Starbucks, so I don’t know why I keep setting myself up like this. Like, “Let’s write a book.” Okay, Chris—maybe finish a paper first.

Well, my last question for you then is—how excited are we about Hilary Duff and the new music?

Oh, finally, the important questions! [Laughs] Yes! I don’t think my phone has ever blown up like it did when she announced that—on my birthday, the same day I won a Webby Award, no less. There’s never been more activity on my phone than when Hilary Erhard Duff announced her return to music with a docuseries and live shows. 

I have my theories about what it’ll be like, based on what she’s been posting.

I’m wondering if Matthew Koma’s going to be producing or songwriting. Personally, I don’t know anything, but based on her hints—she said “new music coming” and added “why not?” to her website signup—I wonder if she’s pulling a Taylor Swift and re-recording her old music. That’s my theory! Maybe she’ll get Miley Cyrus on a song or feature other artists on reimagined versions of old tracks. That might just be my wishful thinking, but I’m so excited.

I really hope she’s playing guitar—remember when she took lessons a few years ago?

Of course—the baby blue glitter guitar! How could I forget? I’m thrilled. People are calling it a recession indicator, and I’m like, fine—let it be. I’ll be front row. It’s so funny that we’re all adults now with money, and we’re like, “I’ll spend whatever it takes.” The price? My arm? Take it.

Literally—I don’t need kids. Take my ovaries!

[Laughs] Exactly! She’s a woman who deserves the world. I don’t know her, but I’m obsessed. She made my childhood magical, and I’ll always be grateful. I went to her concerts with my mom, who was such a trooper—meet and greets, book signings, everything—with a smile the whole time.  When she announced the comeback, I called my mom immediately and said, “We’re going to be front row at a Hilary Duff concert.” Without hesitation, my mom said, “Oh my God, I’m there.”

I love that.

What dreams are made of. [Both laugh]

Chris Klemen’s podcast ‘Chris vs. The People’ is out now.

photography. Zach Alston
fashion. Laura Spriet
talent. Chris Klemens
grooming. Angel Gabriel @ See Management
production. Kelsey Barnes
interview. Kendall Saretksy